Furuba Omake Theatre
by misuko-ikumi
Summary: Akito likes little white birds... They are so sweet... As in suculent! And lots more Furuba madness! XD
1. Cute White Birds

**Furuba Omake Theatre 1 - featuring Akito and Hatori**

**Hiya! We've decided to write up our Furuba Omakes now. So, um, yeah! Have fun!**

**Disclaimer: We do not own Furuba, Acme, Tweety Pie, Invader Zim, The Simpsons or ANY porn book. We don't own very much at all, actually. ;-;**

**WARNING: this page contains seriously random stuff. At the caution of severe brain damage, you may commence…**

Note: In all our Furuba quizzes, we've kinda turned Akito into a scary, evil invalid with a bone disease. So every time he touches something the bone he used snaps, kk? Oh, and he's really thin as well. (And we mean REALLY thin!). And Hatori, being the doctor, is his 'carer'. Got that?

It was a bright, blustery day at the Sohma residence, and the world was generally happy. All except one man.

"Hatori! Hatori! Get your worthless behind up here NOW!" screamed the black haired Sohma-clan leader.

"What is it Akito?" called Hatori, hurrying up the stairs.

"I wanna go outside…" Akito moaned, pointing furiously at the window.

Hatori sighed, "But you can't Akito, it's too windy! You'd blow away!"

Akito's eyes narrowed, and he gave Hatori his trademark death-glare.

"I said…" he growled, menacingly, causing Hatori to squeak in a most rodent like manner, "I want to go OUTSIDE!"

"O-O-OK! Of course Akito-san, whatever you say!" stammered Hatori, nervously running around the back of Akito's wheelchair and releasing the brakes.

"That's Akito-dono to you!" laughed Akito at Hatori's nervousness.

(For all you people who do not speak fluent Japanese; 'Akito-san' means 'Mr Akito', 'Akito-dono' means 'Lord Akito'. It is the utmost form of respect.)

Hatori rushed down the stairs, Akito swearing angrily at him after bumping down every step, and quickly got some extra strong rope to tie Akito to the wheelchair. This made Akito swear even more, as whenever the rope touched him, the bone it had be tied around snapped. Painfully.

"I'm sorry Akito-dono!" squeaked Hatori, as a large mechanical 'Acme' boxing glove appeared out of the side of Akito's wheelchair, and punched him into submission.

"Now," said Akito, calming down a little, "I wish to go outside."

"Yes, Akito-dono, sir!" Hatori squealed, and opened the door to the 'open'.

Akito smiled, or rather bared his fangs in an expression of happiness/menacingness, as he felt a rush of cool air rush over him. He had rather forgotten what it was like to feel the wind around him, seeing as his frail condition forbade him from leaving his bed in most days. And that was just his bad temperament!

Hatori pushed Akito out to the middle of the Sohma front lawn, and looked around at the fluffy clouds, the falling cherry blossoms, and the cute little birds in the sky…

Apparently, our much revered spas Akito had also been gazing around himself, probably trying to remember what a blade of grass looked like, but also at the sky, for he suddenly said; "HATORI! Get me a bird!"

"Wh-wha?" Hatori asked, breaking off from his day dream.

"You heard me, fool! I said GET ME A BIRD!" he yelled, "and by the way, it's 'wh-wha AKITO-DONO' to you, baka brain!"

"Well, what kind of bird AKITO-DONO?" Hatori said, deliberately.

"A chicken, a duck, a goose, a swan, a blackbird, a nightingale, a parrot, a toucan, a--"

"NO YOU IMBECILE!" screamed Akito, flailing his legs around, but being carefully not to hit anything.

A large 'Acme' hammer appeared out of the side of Akito's wheelchair, and proceeded to whack Hatori on the head like a woodpecker.

When it had finally stopped, and Hatori had collapsed to the ground in a stupor, Akito continued.

"I want… one of those lickle white birdies…" he said, pointing his finger of command up at a cute little white bird that was singing a cute (but rather annoying) little song in the cherry blossom tree.

It actually sounded like 'Lurvery Spring', but we won't go into that…

"OK, Akito-dono…" groaned Hatori, rising to his feet, rubbing his head and stumbling off in the vague direction of the back door.

In a few minutes, and after Akito had almost lost his voice from impatiently screaming something along the lines of 'get your arse moving, Hatori you bastard!', Hatori returned from the house, this time carrying a bag of bird seed ('Acme' brand of course) and a giant gold bird cage (which happened to be rather like the 'Acme' one that Tweety Pie has… XD)

"Finally!" huffed Akito, attempting to cross his arms in a strop, but instead snapping them both with a horrendous 'CRACK'.

Ignoring Akito's blasphemous curses, Hatori laid some bird feed down on a bird feeding table (surprisingly!) and waiting for some little white birds to take the bait.

Finally, a couple swarmed down, and Hatori, ready and armed, swiftly removed them from the table, and shoved them into the cage, fluffy tail feathers and all!

"Here you go Akito-dono…" Hatori presented the struggling birds before his lord and master.

"Excellent…" said Akito, in a surprisingly good impression of 'The Simpson's' Mr Burns.

A table with a knife edge shot out of the side of his wheelchair, almost chopping Hatori and the bird cage in half, on which Hatori laid the bird cage.

Akito's eyes widened, and his face broke into a menacing smile that only practiced evil guys like Voldermort, Bakura, and a pair of weirdos called Misuko and Ikumi can actually perform correctly.

But Akito had actually mastered it pretty well.

Hatori got himself a chair and sat down reading what looked to be a Hentai Manga book written by Shigure Sohma himself, but we shall ignore that and move on.

Anyway, Hatori's obviously sick mind became engrossed in this book (EW) and it took him a whole fifty seconds to look up and Akito and realise something was wrong.

"Er… Akito?"

"AKITO-DONO, FOOL!"

"Akito-dono, whatever… Where have the birds gone?"

For the giant gold cage was still there, but the two little birds had gone.

"I dunno…" said Akito, with what seemed like a gob full of full, and a white tail feather sticking out between his teeth.

"I mean, er, I released them, because I'm so nice!"

"Ah, that's very sweet of you!" said Hatori, returning to his porn book.

"Er, Hatori?" said Akito, in a surprisingly subtle tone of voice.

"Yes?"

"YES AKITO-DONO, DAMMIT! Um, cough, I mean, don't you want another book?"

"Another book? Why would I want another book, I've only just started reading this one!" he indicated to the cover, and Akito rightly shivered at the THINGS portrayed on the front of it.

"No, no, I insist that you have another one…" prompted Akito, slight annoyance coming back into his voice.

"But…"

"NOW SLAVE!" screamed Akito, sending a whole load of little white birds screeching out of the cherry blossom tree.

"Fine…" said Hatori, and he ran inside.

Leaving Akito looking around himself in evil glee.

A normal evil mastermind would have rubbed his hands together at this point, but this evil mastermind couldn't, due to a fatal bone disease.

He completed the manic laughter stage though, with 11/10:

"MWUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

Someone had obviously been watching too much 'Invader Zim' for their own good.

Hatori took some time choosing a new book from his library. He had been enjoying 'reading' Shigure's porn book, but he guessed most Hentai Mangas actually looked much the same, so he shrugged and took a paperback called 'Lesbian Threesomes and YOU' (EEEWWWW) and returned outside.

But on arriving outside, Hatori dropped his precious dirty book.

"AKITO, WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?"

For there was Akito, sitting much the same as he had been before, but this time with a huge clear plastic funnel shoved into his gob, with what looked to be thousands of little white flying balls of fluff contained in it.

"OH HEAVENS ABOVE, AKITO - NO!"

Akito was making a mechanical arm lift the far end of the plastic funnel higher and higher, until it was tipped at a 70 degree angle to his open jaws.

By this time the birds were flapping about manically at the rising end, trying in vain to escape.

There was another bout of evil laughter, someone muffed by the plastic funnel, and some fans turned on and the highest end.

Hatori was running around in Akito's wheelchair manically, trying to find a way to stop Akito's madness (which we all know is impossible!), but instead all he found was a front row seat to watch the thousands of little white birds disappear into Akito's gullet.

So later that day, Hatori found himself wheeling Akito back into the Sohma Residence.

"You know what Hatori?" said Akito, licking his lips.

"I think that was the best day I've had in ages!"

Hatori groaned, while Akito laughed to himself.

"Oh no, actually, nothing can beat that day that I threw Yuki and that damned Kyo from the roof, and they got run over by that giant 'Acme' lorry!"

"That was a dream, Akito-dono…"

"Oh yeah…"

THE END

**Thankyou, thankyou, thankyou… :bows: We hope you enjoyed the first Furuba Omake Theatre! There shall be more craziness soon! But for now, have fun, eat lots of birds and bash people with assorted Acme items! BYE! XD**

**Love us x x x **


	2. Haru's Adventures

**Furuba Omake Theatre 2 – Haru's Adventures! Featuring… HARU! (and other less important characters)**

**Disclaimer: We do NOT own Furuba/Fruits Basket, or any of the characters. We do not (thankfully) own Barney the Dinosaur. We do not own any shop, anywhere, or anything in them… except the Deluxe Assorted Poisons set. XD**

**Start Scene One!**

It was a bright, sunny day in the Sohma residence, and Tohru had decided to invite Haru out to the café (as friends of course, seeing as she's such a FRIENDLY person!).

"Isn't it lovely?" she commented, as they sat down at the table.

"Yes, it most certainly is!" smiled Haru, politely.

They both took a menu, and began to read through it.

"Hmmm… If you don't mind Haru, I just need the loo – could you order the Sugar Shake for me?" (Totally rude of her, but oh well…)

"Sure!" said Haru, as she (rather hurriedly) got up from the table.

A few minutes later, a waitress came over to take Haru's order.

"What would you like, sir?"

"Um… I'll have a sugar sake and – BLOOD PUDDING!"

Haru's tone of voice darkened at the end of the sentence as he changed into his infamous 'black' side.

"I'm sorry sir, but we don't serve 'blood pudding'. And anyway, don't you mean 'BLACK pudding'?"

"NO. Blood pudding. Fresh blood. NOW!" Haru growled, crossing his arms and legs simultaneously in his defiance.

"But sir-"

"NOW."

"But-"

"I SAID **NOW!**" he screamed, rendering the whole café silent.

Someone dropped their tea spoon, and a baby began to wail somewhere in the background.

"O-o-ok…" the waitress whimpered, and returned to the kitchen.

Time passed.

Tohru was STILL in the Ladies.

The waitress returned.

"HeRe YoU gO!" she said, crashing around between the tables, knocking mugs of hot tea flying, causing the random extras in the scene to scream, and perhaps most importantly, minus one arm.

"No thanks!" chanted Black Haru, snatching the bowl of red liquid with pieces of waitress arm floating around in it, failing to notice the young woman's zombie-fied state.

Be put the disgusting concoction to his lips, took a large slurp and then—

"ARGH!" Light Haru screamed, spitting out the blood, and throwing the bowl into the air so that it landed over a young couple who had been trying to enjoy their date!

"ARGH!" he screamed again, coming face to face with the zombie-waitress.

"Brains…. Brains…" she moaned, and began stroking his head.

"ARGH!" he screamed for the third time, crashing through the glass door and down the road as fast as his legs could carry him.

A while later

"Haru? Haru?" Tohru came back out of the ladies. "Hmmm… He must have got bored waiting for me."

And with that, she stepped over the wailing waitress, and left the café.

**Start Scene Two!**

After buying a years supply of cream puffs, sugar and for some reason poison darts, Haru was short on money.

So he decided to pay an exciting trip to the bank. (Whooo…)

"Um, hello, can I get some money please?" he said to the person on the other side of the little glass window.

"Sure, how much do you want?" the woman asked, finding his details on the computer next to her.

"ALL OF IT."

"Sorry sir, all of it?"

"EVERY LAST PIECE OF MONEY IN THIS PLACE."

"Excuse me, I-" she looked up, and found herself under threat from a rather large gun.

"O-OK…" she stuttered, scared stiff.

She opened a large safe beside her, and started to count the piles of money as she took them out, tears streaming down her cheeks.

"Excuse me, what are you doing?"

She turned back to see the same guy has before questioning her politely, minus the gun.

"I didn't ask for that much – I just want one thousand yen please!" he smiled.

Scratching her head, she thought that her mind must be playing tricks on her, and she began to put the money back into the safe.

Haru began to hum a happy little tune, which sounded scarily like 'I'm So Pretty'.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING? GET ME THAT MONEY NOW!"

The banker found herself at gun point once more.

"I'm sorry sir, but you said-" she cried.

"MONEY. NOW!" Dark Haru exploded with rage.

She nodded, too scared to speak, and unloaded the (now rather soggy) notes that she had just put back into the safe.

Haru began to hum again, but this time it was more along the lines of 'Getting Away With Murder'.

"Um, not to be a bother or anything, but I really didn't ask for that much!" Light Haru said, regaining control of his body.

"Huh? Wha-?" said the banker, turning around again to the innocent eyed Haru.

"I only wanted a thousand yen – ONE THOUSAND YEN." He stated.

"Oh. Sorry." She wiped her tears away, and shook her head, trying to dismiss the thoughts that she was going mad.

Once again, she put the money back into the safe.

"WTF ARE YOU DOING, WOMAN! I WANT MY MONEY **NOW!**"

Dark Haru let off a gun shot into the air, just for good measure.

The banker screamed, and jumped, hitting her head on the roof of the safe.

"TAKE IT! TAKE IT! TAKE IT ALL! JUST PLEASE DON'T HURT ME!" she wailed, stuffing the notes into Haru's waiting hands.

"What the—" light Haru said, taking one look at the woman, frantically shoving money at him before she disappeared behind a wall of yen.

"That's it, I'm leaving!" He said, dropping the money on the floor, and stomping out of the bank, muttering something about everyone around him being crazy.

**Start Scene Three!**

"Akito's birthday is here," Tohru had said, "and everyone must buy him a present!"

Haru had moaned, like the others, then left, unsure of what the head of the Sohma family would like.

Basically, anything Akito wanted, Akito got. So there wasn't really much left he hadn't got.

For instance; just the other week, Akito had asked for a mega sized trampoline – without a hope in hell that he'd ever be able to use it himself. But he got it, all the same, and no one else had seen it since.

Rumours were that he'd had it hidden somewhere between the Leaning Tower of Piza and Barney the Dinosaur suit that Akito had stashed away.

Another problem was that Akito didn't like much, either.

In fact, Akito didn't like ANYTHING.

So as you can imagine, it was pretty hard trying to find a present for him.

Tohru found Haru moping about outside the shopping centre, later that day, and decided to help him find a suitable present. She had already bought the most brilliant friendshippy thing ever for Akito herself, but she was sure she could think of something else.

They went into the department store, dismissing everything as they walked past it.

Finally, Tohru saw it.

"What about this, Haru-san?" she asked, holding up a cuddly pink teddy with the words 'Friends Forever' printed on it's t-shirt along with a few (thousand) hearts.

Haru tried not to puke, and smiled weakly.

"OMG!" he suddenly shouted, so that the whole store ground to a halt.

"I'VE SEEN IT!"

"Seen what, Haru-san?"

"THAT!"

He was pointing at a heavy-looking wooden box, sitting on a purple silk cushion. It had a large gold lock with a skull carved into it.

"But – but Haru-san, that's a box of POISON!" Tohru said, shocked.

"Not just any box of poison," Haru said, a glint of malice in his eyes, "this is the Deluxe Assorted Poisons set!" He rubbed his hands together with satanic glee.

"I'm getting it."

"You most certainly are NOT."

"Am."

"Are not."

"AM!"

"Do you really think that Akito will like that?"

They both imagined Akito unwrapping the gift, and immediately offering some of the contents to the whole cast of Furuba.

Tohru said nothing more, and Haru 'paid' for his gift at the counter (which basically meant that he let the checkout girl keep her life in exchange for the box).

**Thanks for reading. There will be more deranged happenings next time! See you soon! X3**


	3. Akito's Birthday

**Furuba Omake Theatre 3 – starring most of the Sohma family. And Tohru. And especially Akito!**

**Disclaimer: Wedonotownfuruba. Geddit? We love Akito though! XD And Clangers! XD**

"It's my birthday today! Finally!" Akito said, stretching (and snapping) to himself.

somewhere else "Testing, testing, one two three!" Tohru said, tapping her microphone. "Ok, everyone, your attention please!" The entire Sohma family looked up at her from their seats (Tohru's on a stage).

"Good news everybody! Today is Akito's birthday!"

Silence. Crickets chirruped. Someone coughed. And then, suddenly, the crowd erupted into a deafening shout:

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

Tohru frowned. Why weren't they happy for DARLING Akito?

"Anyway, we all have to go to the house and give him his presents!"

"BOOOOOOO!"

"Um…Please be quiet!" Tohru said.

Everyone (and Napoleon) suddenly realised that they hadn't actually bought Akito a present, and rushed out (See Haru's Adventures for him buying his present).

Leaving Tohru standing in a flurry of falling paper hearts.

Akito's house

"Right then, everyone MUST have brought me a present if they want to be let in!" Akito snarled, spitting at Hatori from his birthday golden throne.

"O-OK Akito…" whimpered Hatori, bowing slightly on his way out of the room.

Just then, Ikumi popped up and said, "Froo-froo ship!"

Then Misuko popped up beside her, and killed her. Ikumi, who was not quite dead, stabbed Misuko and they had the 'going down stabby-fight (in-joke!).

"First pl—get your arse in here!" Akito shouted, swinging violently around on his throne.

Yuki peeped round the edge of the door.

"Come on!" Akito snapped at him.

Yuki crept into the room (we made him really shy) and sat down, as far away as possible from Akito.

"Yuki," Akito growled. "Come closer…"

Yuki inched the chair forward a miniscule bit.

"CLOSER!"

A centimetre more.

This continued for some time, until Yuki was chair-leg to throne-leg with Akito.

Yuki put his present in front of Akito.

Akito stared at it.

"Well…OPEN IT THEN!" he shouted at Yuki, who jumped. Yuki obliged, and a knife revealed its shiny self.

"A knife." Said Akito, quietly. "You brought me, a knife."

"Um…Yes?" Said Yuki, his eyes wide with fear.

Then, found himself with the present sticking out of his chest.

Yuki gasped, as he staggered out of the door.

"Next!" Akito said boredly, inspecting his nails.

An orange haired head appeared at the door.

It was followed shortly by the rest of Kyo's body, who crept in ninja style, before appearing suddenly on the chair before Akito.

"'Allo Akito…" Kyo said, evilly.

"Yes, yes, just get on with it – er…" Akito failed to remember the young Sohma's name.

He looked at his hand, on which Hatori had written all their names for him, but the ink had smudged, and everyone's names just looked like a big smudge.

"Er…Shigurey?" he said.

"It's KYO you dumbass/deaf tit!"

"Damn you Akito…" he growled.

"Whatever Trevor." Snapped Akito, more literally than he had intended.

"Just give me the present."

Kyo grinned at him maliciously, and presented before the head of the Sohma family, a large box shaped gift.

"Yes…" said Akito, urging him to unwrap it for him.

Kyo slowly pulled the wrapping paper off the box, revealing… a wooden box.

"Oooh… It looks so EXCIIIITING!" said Akito, with as much sarcasm as he could muster.

"Open it then – bastard."

Kyo held up his finger, cutting Akito off. He held the box slightly closer to Akito's face, until…

**WHAM!**

A boxing glove on a spring – Acme make of course XD – had punched Akito in the face, leaving Akito's head swinging wildly on his shoulders, and Kyo in hysterics on the floor.

When Akito's head had finally managed to snap back into place, there was a loud scream of "GET OUT OF HERE YOU EFFING TIT!" and Kyo flew out of the door, hit the wall with a SMACK and slumped to the floor, unconscious.

"Next."

The door flew open, and a pink furry burst in.

"AKITOAKITOAKTIO! I LUUUURVE YOU!" Momiji flung himself into the chair opposite Akito's throne.

"Present!" Momiji thrust it at Akito's feet.

"Ah, good, erm…" Akito looked at his hand. "…Mimojo."

Momiji frowned. But, because he was so sweet, didn't say anything.

"OPEN IT THEN, MIMOJO!" Akito said.

Momiji did.

A fluffy chick hopped out, straight onto Akito's knee…Leaving it (his knee) a snapped-up (or crapped-up, take your pick) mess.

"AWW!" Momiji cooed, watching the chick.

"GET…IT…OFF, MIMOJO!" Akito screamed, so loud that the rooftop almost fell off his house.

Momiji, looking hurt, picked up the chick and ran out of the room, crying.

"Stupid asshole MIMOJO," Akito muttered. "Next!"

"I'M NEXT!" cried a gay-guy/clanger, as he flounced into the room.

He sat on the chair with a flourish, his many frilly skirts flapping around, blinding Akito temporarily.

Ayame then flashed Akito his perfect gay grin, flicked a long strand of silver hair back, and blinked flirtily.

"PRESENT!" Ayame shouted gaily, shoving a tiny present in Akito's face.

"Well… WHAT THE BEEP IS IT?" Akito yelled, sending Ayame's skirts and hair flying in a fury around his head.

Then, Toby from Doctor Who popped up, and said. "IAMTHERAGEANDTHECRAP!" Then promptly disappeared.

"I'LL UNWRAP IT FOR YOU THEN, DARLING." Ayame intoned gaily, patting Akito on the knee, snapping it again.

He took hold of the silky pink ribbon tying it, and pulled it.

A tiny dress appeared.

POP!

The dress exploded – growing a size bigger.

POP!

The dress increased in size again.

POP! POP! POP!

Akito was drowning in pink satin and frills.

"HERE! DON'T YOU JUST **LOVE **IT, DARLING!" Ayame said, pulling Akito out of a particularly large 'lake' of frills, thus snapping his arm.

Akito took one look at the abomination, and was sick, all over it.

"DAAAAAAAAAARLING!" Ayame yelled – shocked.

"HOW **COULD **YOU?"

"Sor- ST." Akito corrected himself, snarling at the gay Sohma's birthday effort.

"WE-ELL." Said Ayame, "FINE! I'LL JUST GO! JUST LIKE A TOSSED ASIDE GLOVE! YOU'RE DUMPED! YOU BITCH!" Ayame flounced angrily out of the room.

"Yeah yeah…" said Akito, "save it for the psychopaths who'll listen!"

Akito was pretty good at come-backs. Or so he thought.

"NEXT!"

Haru danced prettily into the room.

"Hi Akito!" he said.

"Hello…" looks at hand "…Ha…Ha…KYO!"

"Uh…I'm NOT Kyo!" Said Haru, his black side saying 'NOT'. (Any capitals in Haru's speech are his black side)

"Anyway, I brought YOU a present!" said Haru, putting a parcel at Akito's feet.

Akito sighed, as evilly as possible. "OPEN it then!"

"Yes, of course NOT!" said Haru.

A Deluxe Assorted Poisons ™ set came out.

"Wha…When did I buy that?" Haru said to himself, puzzled.

"I LOVE IT!" declared Akito, then had a heart attack because he'd never said 'LOVE' in his life.

Haru went away.

Akito looked up from the floor.

"Next!" he called. "And bring Hatori with you!"

After Akito had been installed back on his throne, Hatori left the room, leaving Shigure alone with Akito…

"Hello!" He sang, opera style. (We didn't know what voice to give him…)

"Um, hello… my lover, hello my friend… you have been the one for me…" Akito sang, James Blunt style.

Misuko then popped up; shot them both, left a hate message for James Blunt, which included several references to weapons of mass destruction, then left.

Ikumi popped up in a cloud of pink smoke, restored Akito and Shigure back to health for the sake of the quiz, then went to give Misuko a stern talking-to and a killer hug :D

"Shigure…" Shigure said, helping Akito out with his name.

"Right, yes, I knew that…" said Akito, pissily.

"Where's your present then, tit!" hissed Akito, impatiently.

"Ah!" said Shigure, in the way of a scale.

Shigure presented in front of Akito a small box of the boxecular kind.

"Open it then!"

Shigure greedily ripped the paper away, revealing a set of… Ecchi Manga.

"Porn books." Said Akito flatly.

Shigure nodded, his head almost flying off with his eagerness.

"Just one problem."

"What?" asked Shigure, failing to tear his eyes away from the cover of one particularly 'revealing' book.

**SPOILER**

"I'm a girl."

(We are sorry for any severe disturbance this may have cause you, but Akito really is a girl. Just read Furuba 17 to see! It's in Japanese, but oh well…)

**END SPOILER**

Next up was Tohru.

She ran in and gave Akito a hug, apologising when he snapped in half.

"I love cherry coke!" Ikumi said.

"Here's you present, Akito!" Tohru said, opening it for him without being asked, because that was the kind of nice/annoying person she was.

A heart shaped frame with diamante jewels stuck round the edge was revealed.

A picture of Akito strangling Tohru was inside.

"Isn't it…Nice?" Tohru said, tentatively. "That was the only photo I could find with us two together…" she trailed off.

camera cuts to outside the room. A smash, a splintering of glass, and a million screams can be heard. Then Tohru stumbles out, clutching her face

**Um, yes… thanks! Hope you enjoyed it! They'll be more soon, hopefully! WE LOVE AKITO! XD YEY!**


	4. Akito's Bathday!

**Hello! Welcome to another Furuba Omake:D Hope you enjoy it and have fun! **

**IMPORTANT NOTE! This happens one year minus a day after the last Omake (because it has to, OK!) which is VERY IMPORTANT when you are reading this so you know we are not mad. Thankyou.**

**Disclaimer: we do not own any of the cast of Furuba. End of.**

"Akito…"

Silence.

"Akito."

Snuffle.

"Akito!"

"Gragh…" muttered Akito.

"AKITO!" Hatori screeched.

"PISS OFF!"

"Akito! Don't say naughty words!"

"Off is not a naughty word." Akito sulked.

"Anyway, it's time to get up!"

"NO."

"Come on, Akito. Today is bathday! Cos tomorrow is your birthday!"

"Arrr." Said Akito, rolling over and snapping several bones in the process.

"Come on, Akito. Get up."

"No, no, no. Go AWAY."

"I'll touch you and your bones will snap!" Hatori threatened.

"Fine…" Akito muttered. "Stupid annoying Hatori bastard…"

Akito spectacularly tumbled out of bed, snapped his legs, and fell into a waiting chair, snapping the remaining bones.

"I'll go and run your bath." Said Hatori, tiredly.

"You go and do that." Muttered Akito.

After running the bath, Hatori tested the water.

And DIED!

It was WAY too hot. His hand was dead, throbbing and red. The skin blistered.

"OW!" He realised that he couldn't let Akito know it was too hot. So he went quiet.

"Hatori, idiot, what are you doing in there? You've been gone aaages." Akito whined.

"Um, just coming!" Hatori called, going out and grabbing Akito's chair.

After…stuff…Involving taking off clothes, Hatori dumped Akito in the barth.

"AHHH!" screamed Akito, burning up. Then floating to the top like a dead fish, face down.

Silence.

"O. M. G." Hatori whispered. "Akito?" He stretched out a hand to touch him, but his hand burned off.

**DUN DUN DURN! Is this the end of our BELOVED Akito? Will Hatori ever get over the loss? (ahem) Tune in next time for the exciting paaaaaart 2! Love us xxx**


End file.
